With the Captains suffering casualties and heavy injuries on their side, all hope seemed to be lost... until Shinji Hirako appeared, along with the rest of the former Shinigami. Though the aid of the Vizards certainly helped to draw the battle in their favor, it seemed Aizen's power alone proved too much for them.
Post by Kuroda Momiji on Jun 13, 2010 17:00:53 GMT -5
Actually know what? After thinking about it, I think I like my chances of being a Shinigami better than my chances of being a vizard. Theres more Vizards than pretty much anything so I think you'll be more detailed on those applications. So Ill stick with my shinigami application.
Last Edit: Jun 13, 2010 17:10:09 GMT -5 by Kuroda Momiji
Post by Rebel Raven on Jun 13, 2010 20:56:47 GMT -5
Alrightie. So far so good, up to
After a few seconds, a faint yellow light spreads across the claymore, forming into an edge that vibrates at tens of thousands of times per second, allowing it to cut through things that other zanpakuto couldn't.
Like what, exactly? We cannot allow somethig that vague. That could mean Hierro, other zanpakuto, shields, enemies, dimensions, etc.
Kattaerekutorikku
Description - Reiryoku is fueled into Raiton Konkyo, which extends the range of the vibrating blade drastically, also increasing the slicing capabilities of each end. Instead of making the lightning blade larger, it can also be fueled to make a weak field of electricity around the blades that stuns the opponent if they make contact with it. If Kuroda swings it by the chain, the blade reaches even farther.
Type - Lightning, Offensive, Physical
Range - 2-5 meters w/o chain, up to 15 meters w/ chain
Limitation - The primary form takes a large amount of Reiryoku and cannot be sustained for long periods of time without leaving Kuroda too weak to fight. And against stronger opponents, the latter form only lasts for a few milliseconds, depending on their Reirykou level. Also, because it is just an extension of the blade, it can be blocked by another zanpakuto.
No. If one were to swing with the stun aura, miss with the blade, but hit with the aura, there could be some coup de grace followup and the opponent would be stuned and unable to avoid it.
The sword can stun a person and severely reduce the window of opportunity to even dodge the oncoming blade. Basically this power is far too abuseable, especially against people of equal, or lesser tier, and even allows for potential in fighting a person above tier with some ease as fights in bleach last moments in themselves.
Raikou Heki
Description - This is quite possibly one of Raiton Konkyos strongest abilities, but also one of the more risky ones. By swinging Raiton Konkyo in circles above his head, Kuroda negatively charges the air in the vicinity, turning it into a literal 'lightning magnet'. Then by fueling a small amount of Reiryoku into the blade, positively charged sparks surge through the negative air, creating a gigantic power surge which engulfs anything in the negatively charged air.
Type - Lightning, Offensive, Kido
Range - 25 meters diameter
Limitation- This attack is incredibly unpredictable, it will not only get the enemies in the negative air, it is also possible that it will get any allies on accident. Only Kuroda can even somewhat sense approximately how far the negative air reaches and is able to get out of range.
Despite the risk, there's no limit on how often he can do this apparently, so no.
Mirraraikou
Description - Raiton Konkyo generates a spherical barrier around Kuroda and possibly other allies, stopping physical attacks and sending energy attacks into a different direction.
Type - Lightning, Defensive, Physical/Kido
Range - 3-10 meters diameter.
Limitation - If Raiton Konkyo is engaged by another zanpakuto before the shield is complete, it is negated, and because of the amount of power it takes to reflect or block attacks, the shield can only reflect or block one attack at a time, if faced with more, it will shatter.
There's no consideration for tiers in this, no limitations on how often he can use it, no idea how fast it can come up, and really, one person can only make one attack at a time.
What constitutes as an attack? A single projectile? Would A quincy using the arrow spray break the barrier in that case, or is that one attack?
I see that "one attack" imitation as vague, and abusable.
When the attack is redirected, is it redirected back at the attacker, or at other opponents? What happens if he redirects an attack onto itself, like a Cero?
Basically this ability needs more thought, and details.
Post by Kuroda Momiji on Jun 14, 2010 0:10:51 GMT -5
Ok I fixed those bits. I put down how long they last and their cool down time and I was more specific about what the vibrating edge could cut, and also replaced the 'Stun' ability of my zanpakuto.
Post by Rebel Raven on Jun 14, 2010 1:49:15 GMT -5
The Zanpakuto cuts through too much stuff.
Instead of making the lightning blade larger.
instead of making the blade larger, it does what?
What sort of damage are you wanting to do with Raikou Heki?
That shield is too powerful to overpower a lvl 50 kido, and guarenteed 6th espada Cero. YOu're practiclaly demanding a tier in deflecting up to a middle level strong. If you were placed at Low Level weak, that's near something of 6 tiers of power encompasing the entire low levels, and the middle levels, for instance.
There too much assumption with the shield, and the power gap between middle level and 6th espada can vary heavily meaning he could, theoretically, deflect the cero from a high level character.
Post by Kuroda Momiji on Jun 14, 2010 13:14:27 GMT -5
I've decided that Raikou Hekki is just too confusing of an attack, so I've changed it into a different type of Kido attack.
Ill sum up what I changed in the round of edits, just to help out a little. 1. The vibrating edge can cut hado up to level 20, Heirro and not cut, but match up against the Seele Schneider. 2. The shield can reflect up to a level 25 kido, a cero from a medium level/ average hollow, and like before, stop a medium level/ average physical attack. 3. Changed Raikou Hekki intro a different attack.
Heres hoping.
P.S. Once I've been using thi character for awhile, make many posts, contribute to storylines, and upgrade to Bankai, Might I be able to apply to become a captain?
Last Edit: Jun 14, 2010 13:22:37 GMT -5 by Kuroda Momiji
Because it's here, and because I'm all OCDish, I'm just gonna cut in and say you need to pay attention to tiers. If Uryuu, who is High Level Weak used a Seele Schneider against you, versus one of my OCs, Makana, who is Mid Level Average, assuming your character was Mid Level Average, do you think you would be able to block both of them?
You're not automatically on par with everyone of mid level, btw. If you were given, say, Mid Weak, and were fighting a Mid Strong, you're not gonna be on par. That's a big gap.
Lastly, don't come out and ask if you can apply to become captain. Rank means absolute shit. The only thing rank means is responsibility, with the exception being the Eleventh, where the three highest officers just throw it all Yumi's way. Sure, you can apply, it doesn't mean you'll get the spot.
Character List "Let's eat, Grandma!" "Let's eat Grandma!" Commas save lives.
Post by Kuroda Momiji on Jun 14, 2010 14:00:09 GMT -5
Well with the Seela Schneider, that since they are all the same tool, I thought that they all vibrated at the same speed, And Kurodas sword matches that speed, therefore it wouldn't cut it, they would just cancel out. If Seele Schneider differs from Quincy to Quincy then yeah, I could change it to depend on teirs.
Post by Rebel Raven on Jun 14, 2010 18:27:48 GMT -5
I still don't like the way you describe it's cutting ability. "Hierro" is completely vague. Does that mean he can cut through -any- hierro? If he faced, say, Nnoitra, he culd cut through it when Kenpachi had a rough time of it?
And cutting through Kido can have varying problem because you're rather indescriminate about it. Lets look at ol' Bakudo 1 Sai. It's a technique that pressures a person to the ground with their arms bound behind their back by an invisible force. How is one going to cut through that?
Bakudo 8 Seki is a defensive shield. Doe that mean your character can cut through that?
Then there's the simple fact that not all kido is cast equally. You're assuming you can cut through even a captain's version of Kido 1-20.
And there's no way to match a Seele Shneider without being one because those items break down spirit particles, and make them easier to absorb by the quincy. On equal terms at best, it'd cut through your sword's aura and go straight for the sword. That's what it does.
Shinkôn Sutôraikadenkôu
Description - Raiton Konkyô is swung in any direction, releasing dense spiritual energy in the form of two disks of red lightning. Type - Lightning, Offensive, Kido
Range - Disks are 1 meter diameter, travel up to 50 meters.
Limitation- This attack travels in a straight line and can be dodged easily. Also the disks are connected by red lightning and swirl around eachother while they travel, so they can be dodged all at once. THis can be used once every two posts.
This power needs an overhaul. The descriptor doesn't match the limitation's description of the attack. The discs are 1 meter across, but how far are they separated by the connected lightning? Are they side by side, or stacked over eachother?
Sure the ability can be used every other post, but how many times total can it be used? What sort of taxation does it cause on his energy?
What sort of damage does it do?
I think there's more descriptor that can be added in general.
The shield power just isn't worded properly for a lot of reasons stated before. You assume all kido is cast the same. Then there's double speed returns that's problematic. You assume your tier in saying what it can stop.